in the last few days i've a heard a wide range of opinions regarding the legacy the pope. everything from the greatest human ever to the catalyst behind the demise of catholicism. i suppose all great figures spur extreme opinions and the pope is no expection. there are several facets to the pope which can't be put into a single tidbit of either being good or bad, because you aren't doing the man any justice.

my legacy of the pope comes from the anecdotes of my father describing life under communist poland before the church elected a pole as their spiritual leader. it was a godless, spiritually dead nation where faith was shrouded in deep secrecy. lenin was the state authorized version of god and anything else made you the enemy. you didn't wear a cross around your neck, but a pin of lenin. that was your god, whether you liked it or not. then the radical transition in 1980s where a religious leader stirred polish nationalism to break away from its oppression throughout much of the 20th century. the pope lived through it all as well; he survived nazi occupation, soviet occupation, communism and through it secrectly devoted his life to the teachings of the catholic church. and upon being elected pope, returned to his native land bring about radical political and social change. within a single visit everything slowly began unravel. one man, completely devoted something else went into poland and said his people should have god. the next few years witnessed uprisings, political mobilization and all of which the pope whole heartedly supported. indirect revolutionary if you will. by 1989, the polish communists were toppled and spread like wildfire to neigbouring countries. in 1991, the socialist experiment a la soviet style, which defined much of 20th century relations diminished.

he defined the political and social landscape of his native land for generations to come. few nights ago i watched a powerful clip of the pope standing face-to-face with the polish dictator; stern yet humbly listening to the polish dictator mutter carelessly and his knees literarily trembling knowing he is the presence of a single man who embodied polish liberty and had the nation behind him. that's the pope, i will remember above all and what he represents to my ancestral homeland.

john paul ii as the pope is a little more difficult to approach. one criticism against him is his utlra-conservative stance. i thought i shared the same sentiment but the more i think about it, that criticism against him is rather absurd. it makes no sense; you either agree with the church and what it stands for or you don't; simple as that. what's great about modernity is not following catholicism doesn't mean burning at the stake. they've apologized for those nutty things they've done in that past and no longer monopolize the truth. you have the right to make the choice to seek out our salvation. if you want follow their teachings, make sure you do it whole heartedly.

so to me, it's absurd to criticize the pope for being ultra-conservative; sexist, homophobic, and so forth. his principles are rooted in philosophies founded 2 000 years ago and they may not necessarily match with modernity, but that's what devotion ultimately means. now i know, i've said critical things of the church, even in this blog. the pope's principles do not match my own. just the more i think about it, you can't attack someone's principles, especially the pope's, seeing as they've remained constant throughout his adulthood. ulitmately, i cannot criticize something i cannot commit myself to.

his "conservatism" stems from morals and teachings from the bible. that conservatism gets mixed up with politics and ultimately, the pope was not a politician. you can't think of the pope as a secular politician too heavily drawn into faith, he certainly did not want to thought of in such a way. his "conservativism" wasn't swayed by public opinion and he stuck to his morals through and though. sure, that may have turned many away from the church. but i have to hand it to the man for sticking to his principles in a world driven materialism & instant gratification not bend the church to meet new world realities. i may not agree with many of the things the pope stands for, but it takes balls to be devoted as he was.

one the things that pissed me off about world youth day, pope's little shindig for the young, is how distorted the event had become. he didn't haul his frail body to toronto in 2002 so you could attend some sort of "pope stock" and simply see the pope as if he's your favourite band passing through town. but he came with a message and a purpose; a vision of what it meant to live a moral life. which is why i did not attend the event and criticised a few friends that did for making a mockery of the event. i cannot live up to the standards of what the pope means for me to live a "moral christian life". it's too much to bare for me as i am a person of weak will.

take for example, no sex before marriage. in my current situation, that's a little tough when you're dating a gorgeous british misty queen. plus, i'm being rational. marriage is something that hasn't come up yet in this relationship. let's say, hypothetically i lived the moral life as according to the pope and waited until marriage before doing the boogie. what if it doesn't work out between then and now? i'd probably kill myself knowing i missed an opportunity to do naughty things with misty queen. as you can see, i have a weak will and beautiful british girls who actually talk to me, make it even worse. i respect the couples who actually do wait, that's fucking amazing and all the power to you for it, but something i cannot do. and thankfully, neither can misty queen.

so when i saw those clips of those hundreds and thousands of young gathering at the pope's WYD events, it made me sick because few of those actually understand what it's about. the pope isn't there for your viewing pleasure but speak of how you should live. okay, maybe some young folks at WYD had a change of heart. the people i know that went are doing the exact anti-pope things they did in the past and this week have the galls to tell me pope's visit to toronto changed their lives and bring up the fact i did not go.

so that's how i'll remember the pope: the polish nationalist; a man devoted to his morals and would not budge despite the public light and open criticism; a mortal committed to something so great that few us even can begin to comprehend. you may believe it, but his determination was there until the very last breath. he tried to show that through WYD but sadly, whether it's the pope endless hope in the young or the youth's ignorance, the event's meaning got lost somewhere along the way.